This story contains dark themes.
The following story is very different from anything else I’ve ever written, and in the time since I first made it available it has gotten a bigger response, both negative and positive, than any of my others. Dealing with themes of despair, shattered hopes, and suicide, I wrote this during one of the darkest times in my life, and it unapologetically reflects it. The Holidays: Year One was actually written as a retelling of If Only For A Night from a much more positive place. If you need a hopeful ending you’ll be much happier rereading that one and giving If Only a pass.
I’ve gotten mixed critiques about this story; some good, some bad, but all of them with strong emotion. That, you see, is the whole point of storytelling: to share an experience with others. The thing of it is though is that life is a wide open place full in equal parts with beauty, joy, and sometimes pain. To understand the human condition one has to be able to see in people not just their moments of triumph, but also their losses. Wishes and fears in equal parts.
I honestly think that this is the best piece that I’ve ever written, and I invite you to read it, but please, if this may take you to a bad place I request that you give it a pass.